Well, no post for a year? Spooky that came back nearly 1 year to the date of the last post. Lots been going on, lots of changes – well apart from with my website and here! I aim to rectify that. I have started putting an inspiring quote a day on twitter if you want to follow, and have started writing a book on a mental fitness plan (based on a physical fitness plan idea) so am hoping to post sections as I write and see how they go….here’s the intro – totally unedited, which is such a big step for me as usually redo to death hoping to get perfect then give up!!
Mental Fitness Plan – intro
Emotions are the most important thing and yet we avoid them. We are told about exercising every week, and eating 5 a day but no guidelines are given on how to be mentally healthy. We even go as far a to stigmatise people with ‘mental health issues’, even though most people have them to some degree. I want to change that by making mental fitness a thing to be proud of having, a norm.
So what do I mean by mental fitness:
Being calm and assertive no matter what
Being yourself and comfortable in all situations
Feeling alive and passionate about something
Signs it’s not:
- Anxiety and worry
- Being negative towards yourself, or others
- Worry what others think
- Avoiding situations & not following your dreams
- Not being content for most of the time
We all have bad days and no-one is mentally healthy all the time, just as athletes have off days and injuries, but it is about knowing what healthy is and bouncing back. If you broke your leg you wouldn’t think you had to live with it for the rest of your life – you’d heal it and expect to get full health back, and yet with emotional issues we stay wounded and let it hold us back in life. Your mind is a muscle just like other muscles, and it can be strengthened with correct use.
So let’s just look at why emotions are so important:
- We are motivated to be happy and avoid unhappiness
- Every decision is based on this – it’s how we know what we want, or don’t want
- We chase all other external things to get a feeling
- Feelings can help us do things, or stop us going for what we want (lack of confidence, nerves etc)
- It’s how we communicate with each other
- For survival – both love and fear are essential
- Intense emotions can change our life
Yet how many of us know what are healthy and normal emotions, and when they are distorted. The difficulty is when we feel strong emotions our thinking can be irrational and we tend to make irrational decisions.
We also spend a lot of time trying to escape them or create them without fully realising that they are actually created by us, inside us. I work a lot with people with addictions who will risk killing themselves just to escape internal pain and feel good. Surely it would be better for us all to learn how to be happy within ourselves so we don’t need to escape from ourselves, but choose external things cos they add to our experience of life?
There is also the problem that instead of being mentally healthy we tend to take our pain out on others and pass it on, eg we are anxious so get defensive and attack others, or judge others so we feel better. If someone has been treated badly in the past they may mistrust others and treat them badly too. It all comes from internal pain. If you are secure and at peace you have no need to try and control others, or let them control you. How nice would it be to be who you want to be, comfortable in all situations without worrying about what others think or whether they will accept you? Bliss. And this mental fitness plan it about aiming for that. Or you can just aim for doing enough to make your life a bit easier. It is no different than physical fitness, you can maintain a minimum amount, amending as issues come up, or push yourself to be better and better. Your choice.
The benefits are:
- Feel better more of the time
- Be healthier (proven to improve immune system and general health)
- Be nicer to be around
- Perform better in all areas
- Cope better when things go wrong
- Get the best out of yourself and others
- Be who you choose to be
- Get rid of negative habits and behaviours.
Wow – committed to it now. Feels good…